Raising a Teenage Daughter Starts When She's a Toddler

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Teenage daughters are awesome! However, beware, raising a teenage daughter starts when they are toddlers. I don’t mean that little girls act like teenagers. What I mean is that good parenting starts when a child is born, and the key to raising well-adjusted, strong, compassionate teenage daughters is to put good habits in place when your daughters are small.

Take clothing as an example. A parent should have a lot of control over what clothes are purchased for his or her small children. While it may look cute to dress a child ‘up’ by purchasing that cami for her when she’s four and letting her wear it out, is that the habit you want her to carry into her teenage years? Sure words across her pants on her behind may be cute when she’s 6, but do you want people staring at her bottom when she’s a 14 year old? And high heels at 5? Yes, I’ve seen it. How practical is it for a child to be walking down the street in high heels—do you want her wearing high heels to middle school? Sure, it’s great for little girls to play dress up. It’s wonderful to have a big box full of old high heels, feathery boas, shiny dresses and oversized hats. But a child should know that this is dress up clothing, not what is worn to preschool or out to a restaurant.

Good habits extend far beyond clothing. If you want your 15 year old daughter to only attend parties where a responsible parent is home, then check on who is going to be in the house when she is going to a friend’s home when she is 8 and 10 and 12. Make calling the friend’s parents a habit and she won’t be thrown off when you check before she goes on a ski weekend as a 16 year old and you call the friend’s parents to ensure they will be going along as well.

Similarly teach fiscal responsibility from a young age with appropriate use of allowance. Some money can be saved. Take your young daughter to the bank to open her own account. Some can be donated to charity—let her choose where to make her donation. Some can be spent—help her decide what is worth saving for and what isn’t a good value when she is young and she will be more financially aware when she becomes a teen.

While starting good habits at a young age takes time—it takes a lot more time to explain banking to your daughter, take her to a bank and open an account, then it does to simply deposit the money yourself when she is at preschool—the time and aggravation you save as she grows into a teen will be immense. Raise your teenage daughters from the time they are toddlers!